Things are gonna change...

I've been waiting ages for some software that will let me blog offline, and upload changed files to FTP. Finally, Thingamablog has an upgrade that lets it work everywhere. Subject to the testing going OK, I'll be using Thingy exclusively from tomorrow.

Because I've written the site design in CSS, it's a trivial task to import it to a new blog. Say goodbye to those cryptic pictures by each entry, they're not supported by Thingy. They're replaced by proper Category links, and (touch wood) you should be able to see a specific list of entries in a category.

When in doubt, arrest people

Yesterday, the US junta ordered its poodles in London to arrest Abu Hamza. Mr Abu would be charged with various trumped-up charges pertaining to terrorist activities, but his detention owes very little to judicial proceedings, and a lot to giving the junta's spokespuppet, Candidate X, a good light.

To-day, we hear that the police may use GPS devices and lie detectors to keep an eye on criminals. Especially sex offenders, because they're the worst of the worst, natch. How will this work in tests? Doesn't matter, because the fascist and scientific illiterate David Plunkett "will take note of the outcome of the pilot scheme, [but] aides say he is determined to push ahead with the plan." And lie detectors? The same technology that $cientologists use to brainwash people? Is this man crackers? Don't answer, we know already.

Also: the government can't send out ballot papers for toffee. Next month's European elections - already subject to one pending lawsuit in the East Midlands - may well be litigated in the North West, Greater Yorkshire, and North East because papers didn't arrive.

On the upside, Chile's courts decide to strip Augusto Pinochet's immunity from prosecution. Sr Pinochet, a mass torturer and murderer, rose to power on the back of a US-sponsored coup on 11 September 1973. He was toppled in 1990, after the US conceded that his barbaric regime was doing more harm than good. He may now face the music for his crimes against humanity.

100 Years Ago

Today's local rag reports that students can't vote. A clerical error means that all 332 students at Hunter Court, one of Birmingham Uni's halls of residence, have been left off the electoral register. "A university spokesman said they were aware of the data problem and were working to resolve it," said the article.

This is nothing new. Back in 1993-4, a similar problem hit at Manor House, when the 50 or so returning students were left off the register. Thankfully, an observant student with too much time on his hands (waves!) spotted the error. Sadly, I didn't make the discovery until February, by which time it was too late to put us on for the May council elections, but we did make it on for the European elections. That'll have been another 50 votes not cast...

Hussein Chop

Former England captain Nasser Hussein has ended his professional cricket career, just three days after steering England to victory with an unbeaten century. He's probably right to leave on a high, and to make way for new blood. Speaking before the announcement, Steve Waugh (Aus) said: "As much as people might want him to go, this is not the right time." Oops.

US charts

Gordon Bennet, the US singles charts is duller than a ten pence piece that's been dragged through the mud and covered with shoe polish. Usher spends his 15th (count 'em!) week at the top of the Hot 100 airplay and more airplay chart, his last hit is still at 4, his new one is at 9. Mario Winans, Bouncey Notalent and Twista have dull as anything top ten hits. I'm interested in approximately four of the top 20 - hits from Hoobastank, Maroon 5, Outkast and Evanescance, while generally overplayed, aren't complete turn-offs. Top five albums from Usher, Method Man, Newfound Glory, Alanis Morediskettes, and (er) Gretchen Wilson, while Morrissey has his biggest album ever, in at 11. That's three ahead of Lenny Kravitz, or eighteen above George "Yog" Michael. The Streets come in at 82, their biggest by over a hundred places.

News about news

The New Amsterdam Times apologies for flubbing its journalism.

Well, even though it was plainly obvious that we should have gone after the facts on the case for war. well shucks, we just somehow forgot what our jobs were. Won't happen again, honest. And it's complete coincidence that we're using the same spin and the same "we wuz misled" line as the anti-president.

Over the past few years, we have seen every argument put forth by conservative warmongers crumble to dust under the weight of facts. Yet they still persist. There is still no admission of their error, no change of heart, no humility. Indeed, the resisting Iraqis are still being called terrorists, because one man's terrorist is another man's freedom fighter.

Vote For Me!

Two election publications dropped through my letterbox to-day. I'll quote from them until I find something disagreeable. First up, a note from Michael Von Howaerd.

People have told me that, under Labour, they are payig a huge amount more in tax - equivalent to £5000 a year more for every family in Britain. Yet people say that things aren't getting better.

There are still a million people on NHS waiting lists; a million young people playing truant from school every year; and a million violent crimes committed in Britain last year alone. Mr Howard would do far better by concentrating on the poor performance of the Royal Fail - a clearly addressed letter was delivered to a house five doors down.

And stop. A million violent crimes according to whom? The official figures show a much lower figure.

Next up: the Green party.

Proportional voting in this election means a real chance for you to elect a green MEP for the West Midlands.

Real progress is redirecting our institutions towards strengthening democracy and accountability. We oppose the Single Currency

It's a bit late for that, folks! The Euro is here to stay, and we're simply better in than out. Much as I like their other policies, that could be a deal-breaker. Why oh why do we have so few openly pro-Europe parties, and so many reactionary turds?

There may be more on this over the coming fortnight.

Entertaining...

K! radio playing OK Computer during the first half of The Vault... then playing a song using the F-word and the S-word at 2040... Delays to a Vermin train result in Patricia Hewitt arriving half an hour late to open the Motor Show. The biannual promo opportunity for the car lobby has been moved from its regular autumn date to the end of May, the same week as the Vermin line from London is shut, forcing all the potential visitors to come by their own car, or use the outstanding Chiltern trains.

Universe In My Pocket

"What my theoretical argument shows is that we can't rule out the possibility that our own universe was created in a lab by someone in another universe who just felt like doing it."

Slate magazine reports on how one can create a universe in a small laboratory, and put one's imprint on it in a subtle way.

The best game in the world

Ha! England beats New Zealand in a compelling test that goes right to the wire. Set 282 to win, England looked out of the game by failing to crack 100 before lunch, but a strong middle session, a battling 86 from debutant Andrew Strauss, and a superb 103* from Nasser Hussein, steered the home side to victory with seven overs remaining.

Junk mail

The start of what, I fear, will become quite a long list of companies that generally annoy me.

The first entry is not going to be the worst offender, I'm sure. But step forward Citibank, who I've never thought about in the past. Out of the blue, they've written to me, asking if I want to take out a current account with them. "No," would be the short answer there. I've written back, enclosing their form - neatly crossed out - and told them that if they write again, I'll have a word with the Data Protection Commissioner.

All the entries in this category will carry the picture of the aspidistra, and will be archived in the annoying companies list.

The voice of experience

Former foreign secretary Malcolm Rifkind lays down three good ideas for The Leader Of The Free World to impart into the dunderheaded cranium of Fuzzy Lumpkin.

First, it is more important that the Iraqis to whom sovereignty is transferred at the end of June are acceptable to the Iraqi people than that they are friends of the Americans. Only when the Iraqis believe that they are being governed by their natural leaders and not by the US will the insurgency die down and some stability return... The coalition forces must answer to the Iraqi government and not just to the coalition forces.

Second, for as long as a foreign army is needed in the country it must have the legitimacy that can best be conferred by a new United Nations resolution. Fuzzy Lumpkin needs allies but they will only be available if he is willing to share power.

The third requirement is that responsibility for nation building must be removed from Donald Rumsveld. The Pentagon's experience and skill are in winning wars, not winning the peace. That is for statesmen and diplomats. The responsibility should be transferred to Coelin Powell and the State Department.

The last elected US President, Bill Clinton, added his weight to the UN involvement in occupied Iraq.

There are so many people who suspect our motives. I don't think Iraq was about oil and imperialism but it was about unilateralism over co-operation as a way to shape the world in the 21st century.

The illegal administration should have given UN inspectors a final chance to look for the weapons which it had accused the Iraqi leader of hoarding. Any military intervention should have involved a multinational force rather than the present coalition of the willing.

Democracy cannot be imposed - the Iraqis have to want it. We have to make more partners and fewer terrorists. Co-operation and ensuring that democracy benefited the world's poor would help combat terrorism."

Varoom!

A thoroughly entertaining Monaco GP this year, featuring false starts, engine blow-outs, clouds of smoke, people completely messing up their driving, and someone other than Schumacher M winning. Best thing, though, had to be Johnny Herbert's superb summarising / co-commentating role on the Radio 5 coverage. It was only a one-time booking, covering for Maurice Hamilton, but he was funny and insightful and just the breath of fresh air the commentary needed. We'll have him back shortly, please.

Static and magic

Eleven - count 'em! - new entries on the top 40 albums chart this week, but nothing can displace Keane from the top slot. Morrissey comes closest, You Are The Querry is his biggest album since "Vauxhall And I" entered at the top in March 1994. The Streets slip to 3, and Ash come in at 4 - Meltdown can't follow "1977" and "Free All Angels" to the top, but it's still a fabulous album. Joss Stone and Anastacia hold on to their placings, before Alanis Morissette's So Called Chaos, Gabrielle's Play To Win and the Charlatans' Up At The Lake enter at 7, 8 and 9 respectively. Franz Ferdinand rounds out the top ten.

Other new entries: Graham Coxon's Happiness In Magazines at 13, New Found Glory's Catalyst at 17, Method Man's Tical 0 at 18, Gomez's Split The Difference at 21, Michael Bublé's Come Fly With Me at 31, and Tiesto's Just Be at 33. Only one climb of note this week, Kelis back up from 36 to 20 on deep discounting.

On the singles front, Frankee holds off Eamon for a second week. Yawn. Cassidy and 411 enter in the top 5, the Corrs' Summer Sunshine is in at 6, while Maroon 5 and the Rasmus both go back up a place. The Things You Can't Say on CBBC File is joined by: Pants, and Ass, as (not) used in Scrappy Spice's latest single. We're recommending Muse Sing for Absolution, coz it's good. Lots of Scandinavian talent about this week - Eurovision winners ABBA put Waterloo back in at 20, while World Idle winner Kurt Nilsen charts She's So High at 25. PJ Harvey has The Letter at 28, while Nick Drake comes from a Radio 2 and BBC4 documentary into the singles chart - Magic is his first hit, at 32. UK Eurovision entry James Fox moves back up a place to 35, and Brand New's The Quiet Things That No One Ever Knows is a great single that no one ever buys. It's 39. Oh Millwall charts at 41, one place ahead of The Others' This Is For The Poor. Sting's first new single in ages, Stolen Car, can only make 60. Title of the week goes to the entry at 72 from the Million Dead - I Gave My Eyes To Stevie Wonder. Mention, also, to Morrissey - his drop from 3 to 18 is the first time any single has made that move since Greg Lake's I Believe In Father Christmas in 1976!

older writing...