The Snow In The Summer or So-So

The Snow In The Summer or So-So

Sat 27 May 2006

All right, all right, all right

Yankee right-wing rag the Notional Review has put together a list of über-fascist songs. Here's some lowlights:

My City was Gone, by The Pretenders As abused by some pinhead on his daily radio show airing to two people and a cow in Tuskabro, Dakota North. The lyrics apparently display a sensibility against central planning and a dissatisfaction with rapid change: I went back to Ohio/But my pretty countryside/Had been paved down the middle/By a government that had no pride. Chrissie Hynde was unavailable for comment, because she's still having a fit of the giggles.

Right Here, Right Now, by Jesus Jones "The words are vague, but they're also about the fall of Communism:" I was alive and I waited for this ... Watching the world wake up from history. No mention of the swift re-write from the 1991 Gulf War, Watching the world slip back to history. Iain Baker was unavailable for comment, as he's in the broadcasting studio.

Stay Together for the Kids, by Blink 182 "A eulogy for family values by an band who were raised in a generation without enough of them:" So here's your holiday/Hope you enjoy it this time/You gave it all away ... It's not right. Hmm. D'ya suppose the Notional Review has heard of irony? Blink 182 are unavailable, they're out buying shirts.

Rime of the Ancient Mariner, by Iron Maiden "How many other rock songs quote directly from Samuel Taylor Coleridge?" All of them? We're sensing the sound of barrels being scraped, here. Bruce Dickinson is fencing.

Everybody's a Victim, by The Proclaimers "A catchy song about the problem of suspending moral judgement:" Everybody's a victim/We're becoming like the USA.. The sound of barrels having a large hole put in the bottom. The brothers are on tour and their Vanessa Carlton-inspiring track Aah woot waak fyffe hunnret mile would be tickling the soft underbelly of the Top 100 if ROPRA weren't so shit.

What can we conclude from this exercise, trying to prove that punk was socially conservative? If you twist words hard enough, they can prove anything. Well, almost - nothing is going to convince us that Chris Evans deserves to be heard on a radio station more prestigious than KTSK The Dull, Tuskaboro, Dakota North.

posted 27 May 2006, 12.12 +0100

Intellectual

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