The new British prime minister Joe Ninetyone drew up a plan to create a United Nations protectorate for Kurds within Iraq. He put the idea before Mr. Hurd at the foreign office, ensured he always referred to a safe haven and never to an enclave, and put it to the EC and others. The Kurds loved it, President Sadaam was less keen.

Domestically, finance minister Norma Lamont Badger and interior slug Kenneth Baker gave speeches designed to reinforce Mr. Ninetyone's credentials as an heir to former prime minister Mrs. Thatcher. Mr. Lamont Badger was told by a Sunday newspaper that his old home had been let to a prostitute who charged £90 per hour to perform kinky sex. Spitting Image decided not to feature its puppet of Mrs. Thatcher in the new series.

The Conservative party in the European Parliament negotiated to join with the Christian Democrat union. The EC prepared to lift economic and sporting sanctions against South Africa. Former England footballer Kevin Keegan was beaten with a stick and robbed while asleep in his car. Mr. Maxwell floated Mirror Group Newspapers on the stock market to raise £250m. Albania abandoned the Stalinist-Hodgist policies it had pursued since 1946. Georgia formally declared her independence, suspended since the day in 1921 when Bolshevik tanks rolled into Atlanta.

Manchester United's chairman, Martin Edwards, announced his support for a breakway Premier League, and that he wouldn't lose sleep about clubs in the Fourth Division going part-time. The FA Cup semi-finals were held: Tottenham beat Arsenal 3:1 in the first semi ever held at Wembley, Nottingham Forest beat West Ham 4:0 at Villa Park. The match of the week-end ended with Liverpool winning 5:4 at Leeds; Liverpool were 4:0 up within 30 minutes, and 4:1 ahead with twelve minutes to play.

UK Singles Chart for w/c 14 April 1991

Number One	The one and only - Chesney Hawkes - 4th week (Number 663 in seq.)
Highest new entry	Long train running - Banarama / Gipsy Kings - number 38
Fastest climber (within top 40)	Rock the casbah - Clash - up 17 to 15 Sailing on the seven seas - OMD - up 17 to 19
Fastest climber (within top 75)	The shoop shoop song (it's in his kiss) - Cher - up 35 to 23
Lemming-like fall	The stonk - Hale and Pace and the Stonkers - down 37 to 63
Top 40 debuts	Frances Nero, Quadrophonia
Top 40 exits	Scritti Politti, Silver Bullet, Transvision Vamp
Top 75 debuts	Addams And Gee, Beverley Craven, Tara Kemp, PKA
Top 75 exits	Addams And Gee, Hale And Pace And The Stonkers, Stevie B
Simon Mayo's Record of the Week	All I need - Lavine Hudson

The choice of All I need as Radio 1's record of the week was all Mayo and not Blaxill, for Lavine Hudson was a British gospel singer who had already appeared on the Channel 4 programme People Get Ready. She'd had a minor hit in 1988 with Intervention, and was now promoting her second album Between two worlds. Hudson briefly moved to EMI, but baulked at the possibility of recording secular songs. She says that her career high point occurred at a Wembley charity concert in May 1991, of which more next month.

Just fourteen new entries this week, and five of them are in the bottom eight places. The Real People come in at 73 with The truth. They were a group from Liverpool, perhaps unfairly derided as the new Las, and we hadn't really got past the old ones yet. Addams and Gee entered at 72 with Chung kuo (revisited); the club act continued to perform through the 90s. Belinda Carlisle is back in at 71 with Vision of you, remixed from its first release in June last year when it stalled at number 41. The re-release will do no better than its entry. It's surprising to remember that Belinda's first three hits went top ten, but the fourth reached the dizzy height of number 67. Another Californish songstress, Tara Kemp, is in at 70 with Hold tight. She's the right sort of modern soul, but it's the sort that does absolutely nothing in the UK. PKA enter at 68 with Temperature rising, we've been able to track nothing about this.

The Railway Children come in at 61 with Something so good. Someone will be able to explain why this group never caught on in the way that certain other chancers from the same crater did. Clubhouse put Deep in my heart in at 60. They were the brainchild of Gianfranco Bortolotti and Mauro Picotto, and had had a number 11 hit in 1983 with a medley of two Wacko Jacko hits, Do it again and Billie Jean. They'd also merged the Spencer Davis Group's I'm a man with Mori Kante's Ye ke ye ke in a hit that only made number 69, but has the James Masterton seal of approval. A re-release would be nice. Hint.

Back in 1991, Radio 2 was aggressively pursuing the listeners over 50, on the entirely reasonable grounds that commercial radio wasn't bothering to serve them. Very few new singles made the station's playlist, but the next two new entries did - Beverley Craven's Promise me at 58, and Michael Bolton's Love is a wonderful thing at 57. The latter song featured in MRIB's rock chart for precisely one week, until someone actually heard it and thought better of the heavy metal / Radio 2 crossover. As if Bruce Dickinson would ever host a show on the Light Programme.

Tricky Disco had had a top 20 hit in summer 1990 with Tricky disco; the follow-up, the only-slightly incorrectly-titled Massive, was new at 55 and that's it for Lee Newman and Michael Wells. After two weeks pottering about the lower reaches of the chart, Shades of Rhythm make a 20 place climb, Sweet sensation storms up to 54. No such luck for Alison Moyet, It won't be long dips two to 52; nor for Julian Cope, his new single Easy rider, a tribute to some film star or other, comes in at 51. Oleta Adams is up 16 to 49 with the re-released Rhythm of life.

Remember Carly Simon? Daughter of the founder of music publishing house Simon and Schuster, NARAS winner for Best New Performer in 1971, and took a UK breakthrough with You're so vain, a number 3 hit in 1972. The hits kept coming in her local part of the world, but her career was spotchy in the UK - a minor top 20 single in 1973, Bond theme Nobody does it better went top ten in 1977, as did Why (1982) and Coming around again (1987), and Carly provided the vocals for Will Powers' 1983 novelty Kissing with confidence. Why was re-released in 1989 to promote a hits album, and You're so vain comes out again in 1991 following its use in a television commercial. What's the song about? Who is its subject? We've never been told. This was Carly Simon's last venture into hit singles territory; she's released three hits compilations, a "family opera", lots of cover versions, and two new albums proper.

The Milltown Brothers rose two to 46 with Here I stand, Vanilla Ice's I love you is up four to 45, and Rebel MC's Wickedest sound rises 13 to 43. Katherine E drops a place at 42, and new at 41 comes Queensryche with Silent lucidity. Roachford is up ZZ to 40 with Get ready!, and we're cheering at the top of our lungs as Frances Nero moves up 15 to 39 with Footsteps following me.

Bananarama have this week's highest new entry at 38 with Long train running, the third release from their Pop Life album, and featuring the flamenco guitar of the Gipsy Kings (appearing, for boring contractual reasons, as Alme de Noche). The song was originally recorded by the Doobie Brothers in 1973, and though never a hit at the time, went top ten when remixed and re-released in autumn 1993. It's a bit of a rarity in the Bananarama canon, featuring the group (gasp!) using harmonies rather than their trademark unison vocals. Excluding festive weeks, not until 2008 would the highest new entry be so low.

Up 26 to 37 go that well-known misprint Twenty-Two Top performing My head's in mississippi. The group, consisting of two beards and a clean-shaven bloke called Beard, had been on the verge of hit status for fifteen years before finally cracking it with a re-release of Gimme all your lovin in autumn 1984. Two more hits followed in quick succession, including the uber-sexist video to Legs, featuring the titular part of the female anatomy, as opposed to the tits. The band quickly became a fanbase act, able to get first singles into the top 30 and everything into the top 50, but only a cover of Viva las vegas (1992) would put them back to number 10.

Gloria Estefan climbs ten to 34 with Seal our fate, and Silver Bullet's Undercover anarchist climbs two to 33. Quadrophonia is up 20 to 32 with their eponymous hit, and there might be hope for Transvision Vamp, as (I just wanna) b with u climbs eight to 30. (Spoiler: There's no hope.) A one-place climb for the Shamen's Hyperreal at 29, and Pete Wylie and the Farm climb 11 to 28 performing Sinful! (scary jiggin with doctor love). Alison Limerick is up two to 27 with Where love lives (come on in). Fastest climber honours for Cher's The shoop shoop song (it's in his kiss), steaming up 35 to 23. It's going to be massive! Brilliant! Indeed, between now and the addition of pre-release downloads in 2006, only nine more songs will make 35-place climbs, and three of those are on pre-release leaks. Another song from the Radio 2 playlist, Zucchero and Paul Young's Senza una donna (without a woman) is up 12 to ZZ. Monie Love vs Adeva put Ring my bell up 7 to 20, and OMD have the joint-fastest climber within the top 40, Sailing on the seven seas is up 17 to 19.

The Mock Turtles went up four to 18 with Can you dig it. The group was a seven-strong lineup from Manchester, headed by Martin Coogan, with two bassists, two guitarists, two keyboards, and a drummer. The debut single Pomona emerged in 1987, and the group dutifully contributed cover versions to their record label's slew of tribute albums - at this early date, the world wasn't ready for Kinks or Byrds revivals. The group was something of a vanity project at this stage, as Martin Coogan was concentrating on his day job in the Anglo-Australian soap opera Families. After the series came to an end, The wicker man (1989) and Lay me down (1990) started to gather critical attention, and the latter single was one of those anthems that never quite took off. By 1991, a re-recorded version of the B-side to Lay me down was ready; Can you dig it was all soaring guitars and jangly guitar goodness. But the world was not yet ready for Britpop, and after two albums - Turtle Soup and Two Sides - the group imploded in 1993. They would enjoy a brief renaissance in 2003 after this song was used in a mobile phone commercial. Martin Coogan was last heard presenting the breakfast show on Revolution FM in Manchester.

More Italiano-house, Black Box Strike it up two places to 16. The Clash have the other joint-fastest climber of 17 places to 15 with Rock the casbah, and it's a ten-place climb for Mike + The Mechanics' Word of mouth, but it's peaking at number 13. No changes to the make-up of the top ten, as Gary Clail On-U Sound System manage just a one-place climb for Human nature, now number 11.

In the top ten, therefore, Roxette fall three to 10 with Joyride. N-Joi's Anthem dips one to 9, and Denny Minogue is up two to 8 with Love and kisses. The Simpsons are up two to 7 with Deep deep trouble, and The rhythm of my heart drops one to 6 for Rod Stewart. Up one to 5 for the Wonder Stuff's Size of a cow, and then things get interesting.

Down one to 4 go the Waterboys. The centrepiece of this group was Mike Scott, who formed the group in 1983. Three albums in three years - an eponymous debut, A Pagan Place, and This Is The Sea - cemented the group as magnificent live performers, with ballsy, highly literate, ambitious tunes, none more so than The whole of the moon, the lead single from This Is The Sea, and criminally under-rated on its 1985 release, peaking at number 29.

After this album, Karl Wallinger left to follow his own muse, and ultimately form World Party. The Waterboys returned in 1988 with Fisherman's Blues, an Irish-influenced album that featured some chap called Guy Chambers, nine years before Angels. Room To Roam came out in 1990, followed by the Greatest Hits album. The lead single was the group's overlooked masterpiece, which finally became the tremendously huge hit it deserved to be. The current line-up had one more album in their future, 1993's Bring 'em All In. A long hiatus and almost complete re-casting brought us to Rock In The Weary Land (2000), and two more obscure albums since.

Up one to 3 for Madonna's Rescue me, and no move at 2 for James's Sit down. The interestingness comes from the way James are number 1 in Scotland, the Waterboys are number 1 on the MRIB / Network chart, but Chesney Hawkes holds for a fourth week at the top of the CIN countdown. The one and only number one? No, the one and only one of three completely different number ones, and they're all cracking songs.

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