19February

Joyce Hatto was a high-quality and prolific piano player. She amassed a 100-CD discography between 1990 and 2004, and was highly praised in reviews. Mrs. Hatto was said to have suffered from cancer for over 30 years, and never appeared in public.

Now, Gramophone has reported something very strange. You hear this Liszt work of Mrs. Hatto's? That's by Laszlo Simon, that is. Note for note, as one might expect, but millisecond for millisecond, which one would certainly not. The files are so identical that they return the same 128-bit hash key, a mathematical process that can distinguish between 3x10³² different files. Another track was stretched by slightly over 15%, enough to turn a slow piece into a very slow one.

(More on this strange tale - 422 words)

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20February

(That chart countdown in full - 998 words)

There were two One Week Wonders this week in 1997, acts spending their only seven days in the UK top 40. Joining Alfonzo was Bennet, with a song that we've never quite managed to place. Is it a clever spoof on the observational lyrics of the Britpop era? Was it made by a bunch of chancers who wanted to see just how desperate a record label was for a hit? Or was it a reaction to one of the longest-running and most well-remembered advertising campaigns of the era? Here's a fansite to help you decide. Whichever way, the song is not available to buy through legal download services, nor available through illegal download services. So, dubbed from cassette tape no less, we proudly present Bennet's one and only hit, My mum has gone to Iceland.

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Two Songs a Week

21February

We recommend: Gabriela Kulka on Radio 3 (OK, OK, that's Polish Radio 3.)

Tim Luckhurst laments the decline of Radio Five from a breaking-news station to chitter-chatter and sport. If the BBC is going to do chitter-chatter and sport, would it be grown-up enough to admit that its 1994 changes to the network were a gross error, and reverse them? Nigel and Earl had a point.

Jeff Smith will be the new head of music at Radio 2. He held a similar role at Radio 1 between 1997 and 2000, responsible for turning the station from a credible indie playlist into one focussing on pop and dance music.

The ECMAs were presented last Sunday, with three wins for bluegrasser JP Cormier, indie band the Joel Plaskett Emergency, and for alternative group In-Flight Safety.

In an update to our piece on Monday, William Barrington-Coupe has defended himself against charges of fraud, plagarism, and being totally out of tune in the Hatto Trick. Jessica Duchen has evidence that Mrs. Hatto was alive until 2006, removing one particular lingering doubt.

Geoffrey Wheatcroft laments the loss of the Third Programme (1946-2007). He speaks of Roger Wright, the intelligent but wrong-headed controller of the channel, axing the 4pm weekday programmes, a bitter blow that suggests a failure to understand what Radio 3 should be doing. Those programmes were in the tradition of using radio for what it's best at, talking about music as well as playing it, whether it was Edward Seckerson on show music, or Julian Joseph on jazz, or the delightful Ian Burnside's Voices on Tuesday, either a thematic anthology of songs wittily introduced or a singer talking about her art. We're not going to rush to judgement on the schedule; best to let it bed in for a few weeks, become familiar to its rhymes and reasons, and then give a considered opinion.

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Media

21February

Metafilter contributor Loquacious warns of an advert trick.

I saw a new ad-trick MLM-scam today. It was an AdSense ad in my Gmail today that read something like "Tour the Red Planet in Style! Comfortable, modern zero G cruise ships. Experience Mars in luxury!"

Naturally, I clicked it. "Tour Mars!? What the fuck?"

Naturally, it redirected to some newfanlged mega-MLM, free-paid survey clusterfuck. If I wasn't using Firefox, AdBlock, NoScript, etc. I probably would have been hit with an IE driveby exploit, a zillion popups and goodness knows what else.

The error of Loquacious's ways should be obvious to all readers. All advertising is bad.

Language Log this week: In search of the millionth word.

Simon Jenkins on the Mad Publicity Disease affecting the government. Where's he been for the past ten years?

When you're at the check-out and you hear the beep, just think of the fun you could have on Chavez's Nationalised Supermarket Sweep! I'm going to take the food storage units, corner stores, supermarkets and nationalise them. So prepare yourselves! Remind us never to let Dale Winton rule by decree...

And still in glorified game show territory, M Sarkozy is popping up everywhere, this time in a virtual world. The customers of 2^eme Vie are mostly saying, Nous ne échappens à cette bâtarde? Il surgit ici, il surgit là, il surgit partout. Ou est la bonne Mme. Royal?

An argument for charging token school fees bears considering. The best predictor of a good education is not funding, but independence; witness the government's perpetual meddling in education since the mid-1980s. Charging a nominal fee, with the taxpayer funding the less well-off, fosters some level of professional pride. And the strangest thing of all: this argument is being made by Charles In Charge.

The London Crass Spectacle will be a disaster. It's already over budget by more than 100%, it is removing allotments for no social gain, and now it emerges that the whole transport system will grind to a halt. Honestly, the people of Atlanta couldn't organise such a cock-up.

But Mister Tony Blair could. See also: his dismissive response to 28,000 people calling out his fat-headed plans for a national identity register (1) (2) (3).

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22February

Anyone can hit number one in Finland, where they seem to have a different chart-topper every week. Though it does help to be performing heavy metal, or ten million beat-per-minute dance. Last week's successor to the likes of Lordi, Iron Maiden, and Nightwish was -- er, a Polish actress with a song from a German musical.

Natalia Avelon is the lead performer in the German touring production of Das Wilde Leben. The show is a summary of the life of Uschi Obermaier, feted as the first groupie in Germany during the 1960s. Inevitably, the show contains songs of the era, including a cover of the Nancy Sinatra number Summer wine. For no adequately explored reason, it's been recorded with Ville Valo, the scarily-eyed lead singer with Finnish metallers HIM.

The songs has been released as a single in Germany, and was only held off the top spot by the powerhouses of Nelly Furtado and Tokio Hotel. Neither of these massive stars has a single out in Finland, so the coast was clear for Avelon and Valo to spend their seven days at the summit, before being swept aside by Ensiferum, a Viking / folk metal band.

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Two Songs a Week

23February

SKY Broadcasting is preparing to remove its channels from basic cable. SKY, which takes its name from its original target broadcast area - the area of west London approximately bounded by Staines, Kingston, and Yeading - airs some very populist, though unpopular, nonsense, including a continuous stream of heads talking about football, a channel of cheap imported tat, and the UK's longest running continuous comedy channel, which recently marked 18 years of pretending to report the news. From next Thursday, the UK's six million cable viewers will be spared such tedious dross as Eamonn Holmes's Good Morning Isleworth, gold-Blue Peter badge-holder Simon Thomas on Your Isthmian League (Division II) Matches Tonight, or the imported nonsense Lost Plot.

If the Murdoch-owned purveyor of crap goes off air, it will be interesting to see who loses out; we reckon that losing the six million cable viewers will shoot the morally bankrupt SKY below the waterline, which must be A Good Thing. We rather hope that Flextech, the programme-making arm of The Cable Corp., will make some good programmes of its own.

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23February

Programmes of interest on the steam wireless over the coming week...

(Those listings in full - 331 words)

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25February

G****e has posted an apology for being moderately accurate. When one searches the world's biggest advertising broker for jew, people are shown an apology from the information behemoth. It's not apologising for aggregating your data, or for making money off of other people's content, but for the results it displays.

G****e goes on to say, The only sites we omit are those we are legally compelled to remove or those maliciously attempting to manipulate our results. That would include certain "g****ebombs", mostly those targetting Mr. X (a drunkard from Connecticut) or Mister Tony Blair (a prochain ancien British prime minister). It doesn't reject the french military victories nonsense. Nor does it reject B&Q appliance warehouse, number 20 on G****e and position 13 on Yahoo. And rising.

Everyone's least favourite advertising agency has taken a huge tax break to employ a handful of people. The citizens of Carolina North are up in arms over a bribe of USD 250 million (€190 million) paid to G****e so that it might locate a server farm in Lenoir. The plant will employ approximately 200 people, and will be subsidised by almost €1,000,000 per job. Don't be evil? Only when it doesn't hurt the bottom line.

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25February

In Germany, last week's 1-2-3-4-5 are this week's 5-4-3-2-1. Hoehner heads the list with Wenn nicht jetzt wann dann?, and there's also a climb for Summer wine. Basshunter's Boten Anna cracks the top ten, along with Traeumst du, the new hit from dance band Oomph! After last week's stasis, it's all change in France this week, with four new entries in the top seven. Leading the way is Yannick Noah, performing Aux arbres citoyens (Amongst tree citizens), the new best-seller. Medhy Custos lands at 3 with Elles demandent (Ladies demand), Shy'M is in at 4 with Victoire, and the three-year-old market is tapped once more with Bebe Lilly's Les cow-boys at position 7.

The moment you believe is the new Mel C number, hitting the top 20 in Luxembourg. Former Spice Girls manager Simon Fuller said that Mel C was the only stumbling block to a reunion, claiming She thinks her solo career is bigger than the band, which is just not the case. When did you last have a German number one hit, Mr. Fuller?

New leader in the Netherlands, Lauwe pis as performed by Theo Maassen. And a new topper in Sweden, where Danny performs Tokyo; the Fray and Justine Numberwang come straight into the top ten. In Ireland, Beyonce, Kelis, and the Fray move into the top ten, and Hannah Montana comes straight into the top 20. Kids, eh. This week's Finnish number one is One more magic potion from Ensiferum. Ten places below is I touch myself, performed by the High Street Honeys. These Finns are barking...

 20 20 Tokio Hotel - Ubers ende die welt
 19 re Razorlight - America
 18 re Pigloo - Papa pingouin
 17 15 Cascada - Truly madly deeply
 16  8 Sunrise Avenue - Fairytale gone bad
 15 19 Herbert Gronemeyer - Lied 1.
 14 NE Boys Aloud - Ruby
 13 re Take That - Patience
 12 10 Red Hot Chili Peppers - Snow
 11 14 Snore Patrol - Chasing cars
 10 NE Nelly Furtado - Say it right
  9  9 Jojo - Too little too late
  8 12 Ville Valo and Natalia Avelon - Summer wine
  7  4 Eric Prydz - Proper education
  6  6 View - Same jeans
  5  7 Clitring Aguilera - Hurt
  4  5 Just Jack - Stars in their eyes
  3  3 Fray - How to save a life
  2  2 Mika - Grace Kelly
  1  1 Nelly Furtado - All good things

Charts

25February

New entries last week included Brown eyed girl, the Van Morrison classic, which has never ever been in the top 200 before.

Missing the top 40 this week are full releases from Grinderman (64), Mr Hudson (53), and Hannah Montana (43). There are download entries from Regina Spektor (69, two weeks before release), Puff Daddy (50, 3 weeks), and Willy Mason (42, 2 weeks). There's a big climb for the Killers' single-before-last, and Shakira re-enters at 74. Two back-to-backs; the Feeling at 54 and 55, James Morrison at 61 and 62.

Just two records come straight into the top 40; What would Steve do, the first big hit single for Mumm-ra. The Essex boys have been on the verge of a big hit for a couple of releases. Highest new entry goes to the Magic Numbers, who confirm that This is a song. And they are a band.

Two re-entries into the 40, the first from the Fratellis on a three-place climb. Three records climbing into the top end. The Killers' new song, Read my mind, leaps up 33 places to 29, Stacey Ferguson's Glamorous is up 29 to 27, and Junior Jack's re-recording of his 2005 hit Stupidisco (apparently now called Dare me) from 64 to 20. After its physical release, Bouncey Knowles's Listen moves up from 51 to 16.

Significant climbs within the 40 include Sophie Ellis Bextor (24-8) and Kelis (15-3), both on full release.

The ROPRA effect seems to be lasting - Amy Whingebag's old single is back up 4 places, the Seizure Sisters are up 3, and there are only gentle falls for Take That and Snore Patrol - even so, the latter's 9-place dip is the fastest in the 40. The decline of Patience allows Take That's Shine advances into the top ten, and the Fray's How to save a life into the top five. And, after five weeks, Mika's Grace Kelly proved insufficient to repel the challenge of Boys Aloud, whose Ruby gives them their first chart-topper.

On the albums list, Mika's challenge again falters, allowing Amy Whingebag's Back to Black to return to the top slot, with Snore Patrol at 3. The Fray's album How to Save a Life re-enters at 4, with the Killers, Lily Allen, Nelly Furtado, and the Fratellis all re-entering the top ten; Justin Numberwang, Akron, and Whingebag's 2004 debut all post substantive climbs.

Highest new new entry is Johnny Cash's At San Quentin album at number 20, with Lucinda Williams's West in at 30. Good climbs for Gwen Stiffeny (47-29), Boys Aloud (46-32), Gossip (62-33), the old album from the Killers (57-37), and Snore Patrol (60-43). Natasha Marsh's Amour and Explosions In The Sky's All of a Sudden I Miss Everyone enter in the fifties.

 2  1 Mika - Grace Kelly
 3 15 Kelis - Little star
 5  7 Fray - How to save a life (12MAR)
 6  4 Just Jack - Stars in their eyes
13 17 Gossip - Standing in the way of control
17  9 Jojo - Too little too late
19 13 View - Same jeans
20 64 Junior Jack - Stupidisco
23 29 Lily Allen - Alfie
26 21 Bloc Party - The prayer
29 62 Killers - Read my mind
33 26 Snore Patrol - Open your eyes
34 39 Fratellis - Chelsea dagger
37 41 Fratellis - Whistle for the choir
38 34 Razorlight - America
40 NE Mumm-Ra - What would Steve do?
46 50 Nelly Furtado - All good things
55 38 Feeling - Rosé
57 74 Killers - When you were young
58 48 My Chemical Romance - Famous last words
59 47 +44 - When your heart stops beating
69 NE Regina Spektor - Fidelity
70 63 Razorlight - Fall to pieces
74 re Shakira - Hips don't lie

Charts

25February

This week, we've been watching...

* MI-High (CBBC) Rula Lenska this week.
* Shipwrecked (C4) for future review.
* Heroes (SCIFI) which made no sense at all.
* Dead Ringers (BBC2) still not that funny.
* World cup cycling (ESPT) more Manchester propaganda there.

... and listening to...

* Ockham's Razor (ABC RN) This week, discussing why no-one has any physical or mental energy any more. Not even to do their research properly - Why is there no brain sports olympics asks the speaker, clearly unaware of the mind sports olympiad. Podcast until 17 March.
* Feedback, discussing why the London congestion charge extension was the lead story, and a train bomb in India was not. The TOADY programme's spokesfrog was wrong: this was a gross error of judgement on the Beeb's part.

Media

25February

A series of explosions and subsequent fires aboard an India to Pakistan express train killed at least 65 people. The attack came one day before Pakistan's foreign minister visited India.

The Italian government has resigned after losing a vote on the deployment of troops to Afghanistan, but was replaced in office by itself. The British government announced that it would withdraw 1600 troops from southern Iraq over the next months, but shied away from its earlier hints of a further 2000 withdrawals by the end of the year, and sent more troops to Afghanistan.

The Financial Times reported that 47% of Britains believed migration within the European Union had been a drain on the country's economy, and that 66% said there were too many foreigners in the country. This contradicts the opinion of the Bank of England, which found little evidence that migration has depressed wages or cost jobs. It does, however, concur with the racist and xenophobic attitudes portrayed by the Murdoch and Rothermere rags.

The direct flight from St. John's to London will resume; niche carrier Astraeus will fly from Gatwick to Newfoundland each Tuesday, Thursday, and Sunday, beginning in May. The flight will be an extension of an existing flight to Deer Lake. The return fare looks to be about £425 per person.

More aviation news, and parcel company DHL has threatened to cancel its order for Airbus 380 aircraft. The planes were due to arrive approximately eight months late, which rather serves Airbus right for sending them by Royal Mail.

Obituary: Dermot O'Reilly, singer with traditional Newfoundland group Ryan's Fancy. The group released twelve albums during the 70s and early 80s, and drove the cultural heart of the nation into homes across Canada. George Jellicoe, a hedonist and politician who is best remebered for resigning from the Heath government at the first hint of scandal.

In sport, Italy picked up a first-ever away win, 37:17 at Scotland. Ireland beat England 43:13, and France overcame Wales, 34:21.

With 56 days to go, the latest polls in the presidential election: Mme. Royal 29% (+2), M. Popup 28% (-5%), M. Bayrou 17% (+1), M. Lepen 11,5% (+0,5%), sept autres 12,5%. In the direct run-off, M. Popup is indicated a 51-49 winner, well within the margin of sample error.

News

25February

It's been one of the easiest winters to summarise: wet and mild. There were cold weeks in late December and late January, and a week of snowfall earlier this month, but the vast majority of winter has been mild and wet.

19 Mo mist and cloud     6/10
20 Tu rain o/n, cloud    8/12, 4.0
21 We sun                7/11, 1.0
22 Th drizzle            8/10, 5.0
23 Fr cloud, rain late   7/11, 4.5
24 Sa sun, showers       7/11, 7.5
25 Su sun, showers       5/ 9, 6.0

Rainfall in February: 73mm; Monthly average: 54mm.
Degree heating days: 390½
2005-6: 597½/808
2004-5: 508½/677½.

Weather