There were fears that chicken 'flu was spreading amongst humans in Hong Kong. Douglas Hurd said that Robin Cook's "ethical foreign policy" was absolute nonsense. Seventeen members of the Kosov@ Liberation Army were jailed on terrorism charges; Bosnians suggested that their arms were leaking to the Albanians in the disputed province. Snow affected the south of the country; drifts closed Cardiff airport and London ground to a halt under almost 2mm. Shirley Porter, the former leader of Westminster council, was ordered to repay £27 million she had cost the council by selling flats to gerrymander a Conservative victory. Photographs will be included on driving licences from summer 1998.

The BBC launched its full-service website, and announced plans to launch a channel in North America. The marriage of Mr. William Hague and Miss FFionn Jenkins was celebrated. The London Pride event split into a commercial festival and a more political march. Greg Rusedski won the BBC's Sports Personality of the Year. The England cricket team won a one-day trophy in Sharjah. The death was announced of Giovanni Agnelli, car designer.

Right, this needn't take terribly long; we need pause only to mention Sweeping the Nation's review of this chart. Just nine new entries this week: missing the top end are Gant, Sound bwoy burial at 67; and Paid And Live, All my time at 57. Big falls - twenty places - for the Corrs and Vanessa-Mae, almost as large for the Course, Chicane, and Busta Rhymes, but September releases from Dario G and Oasis are back up five places.

Pink made 38 for Aerosmith: it would be re-released a year later, following the remarkable success of I don't want to miss a thing, making little more headway, but was this week's best-selling 7-inch single. The one and only appearance of the C word was from the Fountains of Wayne at 36, I want an alien for christmas. Rakim's Guess who's back entered at 32.

The slackening of the chart ensured that there were no fallers at all between 28 and 20: PF Project up 3, Verve and Seahorses up 2. Paul McCartney entered at 25 with his fourth hit single of the year, Beautiful night. Then Hot Chocolate up 3, Backstreet Boys up 2, Sheryl Crow holding, Louise up 2, and Steps still at 20.

The pre-publicity for this year's festive number one centred around the Chicken Shed Musical Theatre Company, whose mildly-famous patron had been killed in a car accident earlier in the year. There was only one thing wrong with I am in love with the world: it's by far the worst song in the top 40, and vies with Oasis and the Verve for the dishonour of worst in the 75. It was twee to the point of nausea, and completely lacked any redeeming features, such as anything approaching a tune. The media hyped it up as a possible number 1; in the event, the good taste of the public won through, and number 15 was as high as it got.

Second-worst song in the top 40 was in at 14 for Vanilla. No way no way had poked its head into the top 75 three weeks earlier, before vanishing without a trace, only to come back now. Like Walk this sleigh, it was based on the Muppets' M'nah m'nah. If we're to believe the urban myth, the song only became a hit after some sort of bet between two producers. Whether it was to reach number one with the worst record ever, or merely to get it into the top 40 in christmas week, has never been established. Either way, it remains one of the most rubbish records ever to disgrace the top end of the chart, and taken with the previous record, forms compelling evidence for the claim that the Grate British Public will buy anything, no matter how rubbish. See also number 15.

Two records out of the top ten, Steven Houghton 9-12, and Elton John 10-11. He's now spent five weeks oscillating between these two positions, never in the same one twice. On the airplay-heavy Network chart, the Lighthouse Family's High climbs into the top 20, and Space's twenties-tinged Avenging angels makes the top 40. It's got the strangest middle-eight of this year, or probably next.

Into the top 10 for Mase, Feel so good samples Steve Arrington's 1985 hit Feel so real. It was number 15 at the time, but completely forgotten within five weeks. Ditto for the cover. Boyzone dropped two to 9, and Natalie Imbruglia holds at 8. Robbie Williams dips two to 7, and Aqua comes down three to 6; they'd spent nine weeks in the top three, tying Puff Daddy's hit, and two ahead of both Elton and No Doubt. Janet Jackson is back up a place to 5, and there's no move at 4 for the All Saints.

Never ever has now gone 3-5-6-5-4-4, and would continue 4-2-1-2-2-4-5-3-7. Fifteen weeks in the top seven, all but two in the top five, means that it would easily shift a million. Thanks to the strength of the current opposition, and the weakness of the songs in January, the 85,000 sales in the week the song was number 1 was amongst its lowest to date. All Saints would go on to complete a hat-trick of number one singles, the double-A sided Under the bridge / Lady marmalade did it in May, and the tedious Bootie call spent seven days in September; the even worse War of nerves could only make 7 in late 1998. Their comeback in 2000 was successful - Pure shores and Black coffee both took time at the summit, but January 2001's All hooked up also stalled at 7, and the group split before having a flop. Their 2006 comeback yielded the number 3 hit Rock steady, but album Studio 1 barely scraped the top 40, and that was the last we saw of them.

The BBC's two singles now occupy places 3 and 2, Perfect day and the Teletubbies both dropping a place. The Spice Girls have their sixth hit single, and sixth number one single: Too much comes straight in at the top. We'll find out next week if it's the group's second festive number one. The future is rocky: March 98's Stop will be kept off the top by Run DMC, Geri leaves the band in May, the official England world cup song - How does it feel to be on top of the world - barely makes the top 10, but still does better than the team, Viva forever is a July hit, and Goodbye's week at the top is too early to give them another festive number 1, beaten by Chef from South Park. A comeback in 2000 is successful enough to generate one more number one hit, Holler / Let love lead the way; their 2007 return, Headlines, becomes the biggest flop of their career, only making number 11.

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