2June

We can only aspire to be like Valerie Singleton - Konnie Huq, who announced this week that she's leaving Blue Peter.

On an Overgrown Path looks at classical music radio, and attributes much of the success of Classic FM to its innovative use of automated scheduling. We don't deny that Classic has become a significant success, consistently pulling in around 6 million listeners per week. We don't particularly find it to our taste, as it is bland to the point of tedium.

Overgrown Path, though, is spot on with its criticism of the long-established BBC station, Radio 3. It fails to compete on ratings, and does not distinguish itself on programming. The current controller, Roger Wright, has implemented a pig-headed policy of forcing the station to play a narrow range of classical music, similar to CFM. Excluding BBC promotions, there are no live concerts in the evenings any more. Nor is there space for greater cultural ideas; world music has been marginalised until after everyone's gone to bed, light music is no longer welcome, stage musicals are no longer welcome, and ideas expressed through speech have been mostly absent since the abomination of Radio in the Seventies.

We pay our license fee for the BBC to produce great radio. The current output of Radio 3 is not great radio. It is drivel, and the sooner Roger Wright takes up a position more in keeping with his very limited talents, the better it will be for everyone.

Grace Dent argues that the best children's television is being made now. It's certainly true that the best work for younger children, those up to about eight, is airing in the present era. But this comes at the cost of children over about 12, for whom there is almost nothing to watch. The gap between Raven, aimed at middle-school children, and the 16-plus audience of Skins, is completely unserved. And what about Saturday mornings, eh? With those fairly substantial caveats, we'll sing to the tune.

We're rather glad that we never signed up for Audioscrobbler, now yet another part of the Viacom entertainment colossus.

Onwards, ever ever on... Metafilter has a calm and rational discussion about an eschatological religious sect. Jemima Wellington-Green has previously asked us to make clear that she in no way recognises this group, which claims to witness on her behalf.

Name That Font! Matching companies to their typefaces. We use Georgia for body text - it's thicker and darker than Garamond, which we used until the start of this year; and Times New Roman for headings and dates. The closest match on their list is to Die Welt, another deliberately-retro news organ. We compose in the monospaced Consolas font, rather than most people's preferred Courier - we find the sans-serifs great, and the letter shapes provide a greater difference between a, o, and e, really useful for tired eyes.

We hear that Lord Benjamin Slade is hunting for an heir, and has suggested that Isaac Slade, the lead singer of rock band The Fray, might be that person. What an odd suggestion. We reckon that it should be the only thing that stood between Why Don't You..? and the dumper: Cardiff's very own Benjamin Rory Slade.

Roy Greenslime says that the slimline Sindytab will fail. Actually, we disagree. The proposition - one main section, pullout business section, and a big magazine - echoes the very successful Hell on Sunday. No quality paper has been a Sunday designed to be read in full on Sunday for many years - probably not since the Sunday Telegraph adopted its multi-section format in the mid-90s.

The other question, of course, is price - we reckon that £1.80 (€2.60) is an awfully large amount for what the qualities provide. A slimmer Sindytab might well compete on price - the Hell on Sunday goes for £1.40 (€2), and that feels about the right price for the Sindytab.

Poland has proposed draconian new laws to ban demonstrations for causes that do not meet with government approval. Letter from Poland.

The IFPI has put out ten myths and lies that make big business feel a little less like crying into their beer. No Rock 'n' Roll Fun gives the Terrible Ten the fisking it was born for.

Empty Television takes the piss out of the Eurovision Song Contest. Moltiva, a gratuitous wedge of Euro cheese performed by Serbia's Marija Serifovic that could generously be described as both completely overwrought and completely terrible (though there is an excellent pan-flute solo midway through). There's also a depth and quality that is completely absent from far, far too much of the mass-market tripe that Empty Television promotes.

But our commentator doesn't stop there. It's the perfect thing for the United States to enter and completely dominate. Quite frankly, we would love the Yankees to enter. It would disprove, once and for all, the myth that Wogan and his acolytes put out. The UK does not get no points because it's too close to the Yanks. The UK gets no points because it always sends completely rubbish songs. Our correspondent concludes, It would also mean than we'd be guaranteeing ourselves at least a decade of dominance on the world stage.

We'll be back when we've laughed our head back on.

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